Biblical Role Model

Hey guys,

So lately, I have been really in a slump. Not just because of the election, I feel like there's just a lot of negative stuff all compounding on my shoulders at once and for a while I didn't even have the energy to do anything. I didn't do homework, was slacking at the gym, I wasn't even cooking. I had been surviving on carrots. And now I feel like I am starting to get back in the hang of things, not because of me but because I had someone I could talk to and she helped me out a lot. That is why fellowship is so common in my posts, especially my older ones. Anyway, today I was able to get a good amount of stuff done and even though I am nowhere near close to my usual productivity level, I am slowly starting to get back in the swing of things. Yay!!!

Also, for the past few days I have been drawn to Daniel. Don't get me wrong, I have read the book of Daniel plenty of times but these last few days I feel like I have just been directed to certain sections, not even whole chapters. Examples? Daniel 9:1-19, Daniel 2:14-35, Daniel 9:20-27. If you are wondering why chapter 9 is separated it's because I read them on different days. There was a lot for me to unpack and personally I feel like there is still more I can look at in order to understand these sections of Daniel. I mean I studied them and prayed and realized that I always did love hearing about Daniel. Not because he held a powerful position or survived a lion's den but just because of his personality. A few years back the one consistent prayer that I had was that God move in my prayer life and that he make me a prayer warrior. Looking back at Daniel, especially today, I realized that is exactly what Daniel was.

Daniel is like my Biblical role model and here are the attributes I admire in him.

1. He's bold
2. He's faithful
3. He has a great prayer life
4. He's wise
5. He is slow to speak
6. He is unafraid

These are all qualities I have desired at one time or another and they are ones I still want. I don't think I should ever stop praying for these things even after I receive them because God will never give me more than what I need in that present moment. For me I get a lot of encouragement from Daniel. He is this guy who prays not just for himself but his entire people. He is not afraid of what other people will say or do to him, he is unabashedly himself and I feel that (especially in America) kids are taught not to be themselves but to be who media or who their friends want them to be. Everyone has to conform or be subject to harassment which is so uncool, right? Right. I don't need no Amens on that one. Whenever someone asked him a question he gave it serious thought and he prayed before giving a response and that is simply amazing to me. He is simply so faithful and I look up to him.

Don't get me wrong, I don't idolize him but I appreciate that God provided us with his story so that people like me could use it as a kind of blueprint for our lives. And I feel that everyone should have someone they aspire to be similar to in the Bible. Trust me, I know people are out there thinking "Jesus!" which is great, I try to be like Jesus too, but I want everyone to remember that Jesus was perfect. And although we can never be perfect in the same way He was we can better ourselves by following the lives of those in the Bible which is (in my opinion) why God allowed these stories to be passed down until today. There are lessons we can learn from every single story in the Scriptures, usually more than one and that is why I think that everyone should have someone, other than the Son of the Most High, as a role model that they can think to themselves, I am going be like this person today and be bold for the Lord by doing this or I am going to think before I speak or something along those lines. What do you think?

Plus, when you have a role model you won't fall as easy because you will have those traits in the back of your mind and you will feel convicted to do what is right. And there is also the fact that when you compare yourself to a spiritual and mature person in the faith it will keep you from wailing on yourself. There are days where I feel like Jeroboam II and then I have to reprimand myself and say, no child you are not like that at all! You are not a Jeroboam, you are a Daniel, a Ruth! It is a reminder to yourself of who you are. On that note, to remind myself of who I am, I write affirmations and repeat them throughout the day in my head or out loud depending on where I am. And they all start with "I Am" because that is how God started His affirmation. It is how He introduced Himself and therefore, since we are made in His image, it is how we must introduce ourselves. And saying it to yourself keeps it in your mind and it only takes 21 days for something to become habit which means your whole mindset can change in less than a month!

But back to spiritual role models...like I said, I am looking to Daniel for an example of how an imperfect person can have such a close relationship with God. I mean, in Daniel 9:20-22, Daniel isn't even done praying before God sends Gabriel (yes, that Gabriel)  to come and give Daniel the understanding he was asking for!! I want to be that tight with my Lord, Friend and God. You?

So who is your Biblical role model? Who do you look to when you want a blueprint for how to behave in a certain situation? I'm curious so please comment!! :D

And just as a note, don't just have role models. Be one.

The song today doesn't have anything to do with this actual post, I just like it  so here goes: No Nah by Jor'Dan Armstrong

And do you guys actually listen to the songs? I put my heart into choosing them (usually)! Much love.

Apology

I am sorry for not getting to posting lately. You guys know I try to do it once a week but Grad life has got me more tired than I originally thought it would. I am either working or in class or working on something for class. There are no amount of memes that could do it justice. But while I'm on that can we talk a bit on apologies?

There are so many memes and songs out there there is even #sorrynotsorry that has been going around for forever and a day. I have talked about forgiveness a lot in the past but I can't recall a time where I ever brought up how to act when you are the one who did wrong, which is just as important and even more so in some respects. Sorry is a lot more than just trying to appease the other person and a real apology goes a lot farther than simple lip service. Think about it. How many times have you said sorry but didn't really feel sorry or apologetic? How many times did someone say sorry to you in that same stank-face way they offended you? You know they're not sorry and yet you are supposed to accept their apology!? What? How many times have you done that to someone else?

Don't get me wrong, we all do stupid stuff but apologizing is important because in its real form an apology is supposed to wipe the slate clean of than wrong you did. When you apologize you can't be rude and sarcastic. In fact, you should never say "I'm sorry" unless you mean it. Why? Because people can almost always tell when you don't and when that person can see you are lying they start to lose trust that has been built. This can lead to a whole other set of issues that are way too detailed to go into here but if you want just comment and I can give an example or two. When you apologize there are some things to take into consideration. I know that your parents probably forced you to apologize even when you weren't sorry but did something wrong. I'm not saying that's bad because it teaches kids responsibility but as an adult you should never do that.

I usually give a little how to or something like that and it is killing me not to right a long checklist of the dos and don'ts of apology but it is not necessary. You know when when you mess up. You know when you do wrong and you know when you are genuinely sorry. So take all those things into consideration when you decide to go up and apologize to someone.

An apology should be sincere if nothing else.

When you apologize you don't have to have balloons or jump out of an airplane. I know that some people believe that the size of the apology should fit the harm done but that's not me. I think that you should come with an open heart and mind and be sincere and if they don't accept that is on them. One thing about admitting you were wrong is the fact that you admit you were wrong meaning that some damage may be done to your pride. Can you handle that? Is the relationship with that person more important than your ego? If not then you aren't ready to apologize.

I have apologized for a lot of things in my life. Sometimes I apologize for other people and sometimes I apologize for things I didn't do just to make other people feel better. That is not okay. It is not okay to do that because when something is not my fault I have no reason to take blame and responsibility for it. I can say, "Sorry you feel that way" but I am not going to let the brunt of the hurt fall on my shoulders because that is not how I operate anymore. And I have a saying, "God did not send His Son to die on the third day and rise again for _________" and in my mind I am starting to fill in that blank with "me to be sorry for living my life". If someone makes you feel as though you have to apologize for everything you do because it offends them or doesn't suit them, don't keep apologizing. Find a new friend because there is a time when giving advice becomes policing your behavior and that's not cool. Especially if that friend never apologizes or throws blame on someone else when the time comes, drop them like a hot pot of grits. They are not there for you.

An apology should come from you heart. You should apologize because you want to and because it is how you really feel not because someone thinks you should because that leaves you with hurt in your heart and I have really started thinking about self care and apologizing for no reason is not a part of self care.